Tis’ The Season To Be Tapped Out!

Posted on December 21, 2016 by - Also by this author

Jim Luff and Fred Nalder, president of the Los Angeles County Funeral Directors Association. (photo from Jim Luff/LCT)
Jim Luff and Fred Nalder, president of the Los Angeles County Funeral Directors Association. (photo from Jim Luff/LCT)
I love the holiday season for so many reasons. The first and most important is the time we get to spend with family. I’m really not sure why we need a holiday to get all of our family members under one roof at one time. That’s a blog for another day.

I started out my holiday season by attending my first holiday party on Thursday, Dec. 1. The hostess asked we bring an unwrapped gift for a child with a value of at least $10. That was really no big deal and the party was free! There were cookies and hot cider as far as food and beverages.

The next party had a $5 cover charge, but it was reasonable as they served pizza and salad so I felt I got value. They wanted a wrapped toy for a child with a value of $20 or more. Done!

The most elaborate party of the season was a $20 admission price with, of course, another stinkin’ toy worth $10 or more. However, this one included swanky food stations, free cocktails, fake gambling, and a deejay with plenty of dancing. Even the jolly ol’ fat man in the red velour suit took a spin on the dance floor!

I hit the Arizona Limousine Association party in Phoenix. It was the best value of the year. No charge! No toy required! No bar! We had a buffet lunch, wished each other happy holidays and I was on my way home.

Jim and Hillary Luff a with flock of grandchildren. (photo from Jim Luff/LCT)
Jim and Hillary Luff a with flock of grandchildren. (photo from Jim Luff/LCT)
There were many more including a funeral directors party where I wore an ugly sweater that matched the one worn by their association president. Yes, another toy was required here! This party cost $45 to attend and included food that was so-so from a buffet with a no-host bar. I need to mention it took me nearly four hours of driving to get to this party that ended shortly after it lifted-off.

The most expensive party of all was the GCLA party at $75 a ticket that featured a fantastic dinner, a silent auction, a green screen photo booth, and a deejay but not one single person got up to dance when I was waiting to bust a move on the dance floor. At least I was spared the obligatory child’s gift at this party so I could afford the $6 beers and a limo service to take me home at the end of the night!

So, I have spent all my money on gas, required gifts, over-priced cocktails, and admission fees that weren’t always a good value for me. I am tapped out of holiday parties for 2016. From my family to yours, Happy Holidays!

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